Marriage during social distancing - month three
As promised, let’s talk about how we are handling pandemic married life. We are now in month three since we both started working 100% at home. It took a couple of weeks to figure out our schedules and how to balance them with everything else. Lessons for the babies. Cooking and cleaning. All the details of life that haven’t gone on hold just because COVI-19 came.
Our saving grace has been the habits we put in place years ago. After years of sharing space, we know what we each like to do, what we don’t, what we wish we didn’t have to do, and what we know we gotta do even if we’d rather not. For instance, vacuuming is not my friend and laundry is not my husband’s friend. Because we already know this, no matter what social distancing work schedules bring, we are keeping normal “duties” at home. Of course there is room for flexibility, but knowing that a full laundry basket is none of my husband’s business means that’s one less thing he has to worry about.
Even so, cabin fever takes its toll. I like to think of myself as an extroverted introvert, which means I am more ok staying home than many people. However, this extended time of going nowhere is starting to get to me. Besides work and stepping outside for some vitamin D every once in a while, the days are just blending into one. We usually work in different parts of the house and take frequent breaks for meals or to help the babies with whatever they need. When it’s nice out, our work station moves to the patio and we hang out there. But mostly, we leave communication channels open.
For our children, this has lasted so long, their lists of things they want to do after this have reached a new level. Their current days consist of Zoom classes, workbooks, art, and lots of music. The oldest can do a lot of his work independently. We stay close to help as needed. The younger ones, we are still learning how to teach them.
They spend maybe 1.5-3 hours on school work and a lot of time playing outside on most days. Since they are only 4 and 3, we are more hands-on with their work. It helps that they are all the kind of kids who naturally enjoy to learn. On any given day, they choose a subject and we guide them through the lessons. We take turns with this or sometimes do it together. This is one of those things that has been a social distancing blessing for us.
Overall, I’d say we are solid even during this time. We are making the effort every evening to spend time together sans babies. Movies. Shows. Or simply talking and laughing about nothing and everything. Life throws all kinds of obstacles in front of every marriage. It won’t shake if the foundation remains strong.
